MASK OR MENACE IC CONTACT

[selfequipped]

"Hey, it's Kate. Leave a message."

Comments

text;

[brushoff]

My line of work is being Dorian Gray, and all that entails.

text;

[selfequipped]

I always thought you were clever. Where did that go?

text;

[brushoff]

Excuse you, I am SO clever.

text;

[selfequipped]

Are broken records clever?

text;

[brushoff]

Rude.

text;

[selfequipped]

Not rude. Honest.

text;

[brushoff]

Something I'm equally not fond of.

text;

[selfequipped]

I didn't put you in the box you chose to climb into.

text;

[brushoff]

Don't phrase it like that. It makes me seem like a small animal of some kind.

text;

[selfequipped]

You're not??

text;

[brushoff]

I would be a large animal, thank you very much. Something graceful.

text;

[selfequipped]

You definitely don't have the STATURE of a very large animal.

text;

[brushoff]

Then we'll go back to graceful! Like swans.

[ Dorian...has obviously never heard the noise a swan makes. ]

text;

[selfequipped]

How about one of those very pretty guinea pigs with the curly hair?

text;

[brushoff]

There are pretty guinea pigs?

text;

[selfequipped]

text;

[brushoff]

Oh my God.
I want one.

text;

[selfequipped]

There are two options as as reply here, so I'm going to put them both:

1. Look at the top of your head! (Ha ha, I'm very clever.)

2. I'll look for a gorgeous guinea pig for you. As long as you promise to take care of it.

text;

[brushoff]

It may shock you, but I'm a capable human being who's holding down multiple jobs and (shockingly enough for me) will probably end up staying in one place for a while.

I'll take care of it and take it to the vet and buy it the best guinea pig food money can buy. Happy, mom?

text;

[selfequipped]

Yes.

Just don't ever call me mom again.

text;

[brushoff]

You'll look for the guinea pig 'as long as I promise to take care of it.' You walked right into it, with that statement.

text;

[selfequipped]

Look at who I'm talking to!

text;

[brushoff]

I'm not a spoiled child, Kate.

[ except no, he really is. ]

text;

[selfequipped]

The guinea pig talk evolved from "don't do stupid criminal things because you think that's your calling in life."

Now, tell me what you aren't again?

text;

[brushoff]

You're just begging to be called Mom again.